16 chapters [complete]
Romance
Sesshoumaru/Kagome
On Kagome's 16th bday, her cousin Kikyou gave her a slave. Actually, he's a bloodbound, which the humans equate with a slave, but Sesshoumaru still remembers what a bloodbond entails, even if humans have forgotten.
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
"Um," Kagome paused as she finally decided to break the very awkward silence. If she could claim even a smidgen of her cousin's priestess powers, she would say that she felt very feral animosity emanating from the very gorgeous man in front her.
As it was, she could only attribute the feeling to the awkward silence and the pale, stoic face with majestic markings on it.
Kagome sat on her bed, which was set at the center of the room, and he stood a mere ten steps away. Still, with the markings on his face and the combination of golden irises and silver-white hair, he seemed so... exotic. Forbidding.
Although, Kikyou had assured Kagome when she had dropped him off here that he was quite safe. "Yours now" had been Kikyou's exact words. Granted, there was a little bad history that had gone on between Kagome and Kikyou, but Kagome doubted Kikyou would lie to her about the safety of a man who was left in her room. If anything happened to Kagome because of Kikyou, father would kick Kikyou out of the house instantly.
Still, Kikyou was a priestess who fought all sorts of nasty things as part of her regular, daily work. And there was bad history between Kikyou and Kagome.
Kagome eyed the man in front of her warily. "Are you safe?" she asked, and immediately felt stupid for asking.
The man inclined his head slightly, and his silver hair seemed to float over his shoulders, the individual strands sparkling and dancing under the light of the setting sun that streamed in through the window.
Kagome looked at the man in front of her dubiously. Purples slashes marked his face in a perfectly symmetrical manner and a waning—or was it waxing?—moon mark was on his forehead. Kagome had fidgeted in uncertainty for the last two minutes since Kikyou had left, but she had yet to see him move at all. Except for those strands of silver hair that drifted and shone under the setting sun.
"Yes, mistress," he answered impassively.
"As in, really, really safe? No hurting me at all?" Kagome asked again; His answer had seemed too... direct. Too simple.
"Not unless you ask me of it, mistress."
As Kagome's confused expression on her face started to clear up, she asked, "Why would I do that?" Quickly, she thrust one hand forward and amended, "Wait. No, don't answer that. I don't want to know."
Kagome looked away from the man standing in front of her as the awkward silence took over again. Her eyes slid onto the two-inch thick carpets that covered her entire suite of rooms except for the bathroom.
A horrible thought came to her, "Are you blood-bound?"
"Yes, mistress."
Gods, what was she going to do with Kikyou's slave? "Why did your mistress leave you here, then?"
"I do not understand, mistress," the man in front of her answered. "You have not left me here."
Kagome's brown eyes widened. "You mean...?" Then, she sighed as she kicked her feet at the edge of the bed again before muttering to herself, "I really should have asked Kikyou what she wanted when she asked for my blood."
She pressed her lips together as she thought about her current situation. Kagome had never owned a slave before. She allowed the servants to do some work for her, but mostly, she valued her privacy and self-sufficiency. She had always harbored the image that if left to her own devices, she would be able to survive just fine.
Kikyou, on the other hand, loved to have people wait on her. Most of the servants in the family were chosen by her and she had her own veritable legion of slaves.
It was unlikely that Kikyou would have let go of such an... aesthetically perfect specimen as the one that stood in front of her now.
"Have you sworn yet?" She asked. Kikyou could have made him swear in with Kikyou as the proxy. In that case, the blood-bound would have to obey both Kikyou and Kagome.
"Not yet, mistress," the man in front her answered. "I shall do so now." Before Kagome overcome her surprise and protest, he knelt on the floor. "I shall henceforth be forever governed by the will of my mistress, the worshipful Kagome Higurashi."
Heat suffused Kagome's cheeks. "Oh, um..."
The awkward silence returned yet again. Kagome couldn't repudiate the blood-bound without severe consequences to the blood-bound. Repudiation was meant as the harshest of all punishments.
She sighed. She supposed she would just have to deal with it. After all, most people who could, owned a blood-bound. It couldn't be that bad.
Even confined to bedrooms, one learned a lot in five hundred years. And Sesshoumaru hadn't been confined to bedrooms completely.
He knew just what kind of person she was; She was the exact kind of person that he hated. Not only would she be ignorant, insensitive, and probably even cruel, she was a true hypocrite in that she would act all gentle and naive and innocent.
He could tell that she didn't care one whit about him—she hadn't even asked for his name, only whether he was safe to her or not. Nor did he care about her. And those sweet brown eyes of hers... they only masked the treacherous thoughts he knew she had.
He could already predict which bedroom games this one would want to play.
All right, so he was blood-bound, and he would do as she bid.
In fact, she would get more than what she had bargained for.
He admitted to his one mistake in life, of accepting the blood-bind. He had been fooled in his naiveté of the people's good wills. He had actually believed him when he promised freedom and safety of his parents in return for his blood-bind.
Instead, he had killed his mother and barely left a breath in his father's body. The human child, too, had died.
And the only reason that he had been able engineer such a plan at all was with the help of the traitorous Inuyasha. Sesshoumaru couldn't believe—even now, didn't want to believe—that the half-blooded whelp would have been willing to plot the death of his own parents.
Izayoi had been Inuyasha's birth-mother, after all, and not Sesshoumaru's. But in the end, when it had counted, Inuyasha had betrayed them all, and it was Sesshoumaru who had sought to save them.
And Inuyasha had went along with those humans and helped him hurt his parents, if not directly, then indirectly.
No matter, all those humans were dead. They had died paralyzed with fear, their eyes so wide that Sesshoumaru almost laughed aloud at the thought of their eyeballs popping out of their heads. They had died dishonorably, not fighting back at all, but begging and pleading for mercy instead.
They had died knowing why they had died, and even dying, they had wished that they were already dead.
Although vengeance didn't bring back the dead, Sesshoumaru had had great satisfaction in the act of vengeance. He hadn't regained family or love, but he had learned to take joy in making humans scream in fright and in laughing in the face of fear.
What would life be like if he couldn't draw blood?
He was, after all, blood-bound. And even if the ignorant humans no longer remember the origins, Sesshoumaru still remembered what being blood-bound meant. If the humans thought that it was simple slavery... Well, then, he would just have more fun.
Without settling down her new "gift", she herself had been quite unsettled, bringing many of her nervous habits to the fore. She alternated between pacing in her room and sitting listlessly, unsure of how to occupy herself. When she had finally picked a book to read, she found the words merging incoherently.
She wasn't used to any man being in her room for an extended amount of time, and especially not an attractive, dangerous youkai.
Which was why the mattress was set in the sitting room outside of her bedroom. This way, she wouldn't inadvertently offend Kikyou by "rejecting" her gift, nor would she need to give up any of her privacy.
She couldn't imagine how she would fall asleep if somebody like him were to stay in the room with her all night.
Thankfully, she wouldn't have to find out.
Quickly, she pointed his mattress out to him informed him that he would sleep out there and she would sleep in her room.
As Kagome expected, he merely nodded and said, "Yes, mistress" before he did as she told him to.
This was the other reason that Kagome never owned a blood-bound before; They were all so submissive that talking with them was about as much fun as talking to a bookshelf, and bookshelves, at least, had books that she could enjoy. Blood-bounds all seemed like automatons without wills.
Well, that wasn't necessarily true, Kagome reflected. Shippou had a will—and a strong one at that. He was the little kitsune blood-bound that she had found while she was accompanying her cousin. That was before she had had that falling out with Kikyou.
And Sango's Kirara definitely had a personality.
She sighed again. She couldn't tell how old this blood-bound was, since youkai generally didn't age the same way humans did, but he certainly wasn't young. Older blood-bounds were usually so used to the routine of obedience that they wouldn't know what to do if they were freed—as the saying went, "You can't an old dog new tricks."
Sango had offered to unbind Kirara, but Kirara had refused, wanting to protect Sango. Shippou was free now, and adjusting quite well to his new freedom, always bouncing around with Souta and Kohaku and asking for candy.
But her new blood-bound, he was so submissive and docile she doubted he would function well in the world if he were free. Kagome would just have to wait and see before she would bring up the subject to him at all.
And even if he were to be freed, Kagome would still have to ask Kikyou to do it, and she was very certain that Kikyou would be offended by that.
With a sigh, Kagome snuggled comfortably under the covers. She realized belatedly that she didn't even know her new blood-bound's name as she fell into the land of dreams.
Although, the bed play might.
But even as he wondered when the human girl woman would summon him, he felt her presence behind the door dim, a sure sign of the conscious mind going elsewhere, generally to sleep.
Unbelievable, the girl just might not ask him.
But as soon as he thought that, he felt a spasm of pain rack his body through the blood-bond.
There were only three reasons that the blood-bond would cause him pain. The first would be that his mistress herself was in pain, in which case he would feel a mere reflection of her pain. Sesshoumaru dismissed this reason out of hand, since he could still feel her sleeping in the next room.
The second reason was if he disobeyed an order, but she had yet to give him an order.
He felt the skin on his back breaking under his shirt, as if he was being whipped bareback. He knew why this was—it was the third and only possible reason: because his mistress was fantasizing this.
Just as he thought, it was always the most innocent-seeming ones who were the cruelest.
He should have learned by now, after five hundred years. He should no longer be surprised by the humanity in humans. After his first mistake from when he still trusted others, he shouldn't—and wouldn't—make anymore.
Well, in a rough game like his mistress's, two can play. And Sesshoumaru had had much more practice.
Sesshoumaru rose from his mattress and walked to the door to his mistress's bedroom.
She knew the cost of her actions. After all, she would be repeating her mother's "mistake."
Only, it wouldn't be a mistake.
Nobody could blame her for taking the only course of action allowed to her.
She smiled a bitter and mocking smile at herself when she thought about all that had happened, and the wrong choices that she had made, some of it with Inuyasha.
Most of it with Inuyasha.
And to think, at one time, she had considered giving the Shikon no Tama to him once she found it. So that he could change into a true human.
Even now, it hurt.
But just because she released him for his blood-bound didn't mean that she couldn't bind him again.
Oh, she knew that he wouldn't willingly enter a blood-bound if she asked him, but there were other ways to induce a blood-bound.
But there would be a price to pay.
There was always a price to pay.
It was worth it, Kikyou had decided long ago. Vengeance and satisfaction and leashing of a black-heart... All she'd have to pay with were her miko powers.
Not that miko powers had ever done her any good. She would just see this as the last action she did for the world. After all, what had the world done for her?
A small part of her admitted, though, that she was curious.
She was curious about just what it would have been like. What it could have been like.
So, there wouldn't be any love from him, but a small part of her still didn't want to give up the love she had held for him. And this—tonight—would be her only chance to find out what could have been.
If Kagome hadn't known that her miko powers amounted to next to nothing, she would have warned Kikyou of her repeated dreams.
But if they were true dreams, no doubt Kikyou would have dreamt them as well.
Besides, Kikyou would never listen to anything that Kagome said, especially not about Inuyasha. Kagome had no idea what had happened, but Kikyou and Inuyasha seemed to have had a falling-out. She doubted Kikyou would appreciate Kagome finding excuses for Inuyasha.
Kagome looked up as the presence stepped through the door.
The silhouette was tall and regal, and for a moment, Kagome simply sat on her bed and admired his profile. Then, she realized that it was Sesshoumaru.
"Oh," Kagome sighed.
Then, he turned to leave, his long silver hair flowing behind him the way Inuyasha's had in her dream.
"No," she whispered in a hoarse voice as the horrors came back again.
At least she had that much control.
As he had stepped through, all he had seen was the big bed fluffed with soft niceties and his petite mistress sitting up in the bed. Except for her glorious flow of black hair, she seemed to be engulfed in her bed.
Her scent of springtime innocence enticed him even from the distance, but his sweet musing turned into cold anger in the next moment; Just as he thought, absolutely nothing was wrong with her.
Disgusted, Sesshoumaru turned to leave.
"No." Shocks of pain went through his body, but because she had merely whispered the word, they hurt very little and Sesshoumaru was very used to pain.
"Stay," she said, again in that whisper that made him want to strangle her in its deceptive weakness.
Stay. Like a dog. His eyes flashed red for a mere moment. Good doggy, stay. Like his first mistress.
True, he was an inuyoukai, but the dog was only his alternate form. He had just as much humanity as any human—even more than most.
At least, he had had humanity once, but like all good traits, the world killed his humanity quickly.
But his body betrayed him even as he sought to disobey her and move away.
Fine, he would stay, but he wasn't going to comply to her orders complacently.
Obstinately, Sesshoumaru stood still at the doorway, perversely curious of how she would punish him for refusing her nonverbal command.
"Stay with me," he heard her whisper into the silence.
"Please."
She tried to soften her command.
"Please," she whispered into the heavy silence. If Sesshoumaru's shadow was not so apparent against the light in the sitting room, she wouldn't even have known that he was there.
The silence resumed as if she had never interrupted it.
Kagome stared at her blanket. She didn't want to force him into doing anything, but she didn't want to return to her nightmares anymore either.
At the remembrance of her nightmares, Kagome instinctively curled up tighter, as if the nightmares would somehow overlook her if she hid well enough in the shadows of the subconscious realm.
Just as she thought that Sesshoumaru was so disgusted with her that he would wait out her command, she felt the edge of her bed dip.
Then, he sat on her covers beside her.
Kagome turned to look up at him, his expression inscrutable and his posture rigid.
Still, he was real, a great big mass of body next to her and he was blood-bound to protect her.
She had sent for him with a missive in her own handwriting, after all.
Although, Inuyasha admitted that he was more than a little trepidatious about the reason that she would call for him.
They had had a falling out, where Kikyou had turned a cold shoulder towards him and his concerns, and the worst of it was that Inuyasha didn't even understand what had precipitated it.
Even worse, today, Kikyou had bought and used a slave in front of Inuyasha. A pleasure slave. A whore, Inuyasha thought.
But it hadn't been just any slave.
It had been Sesshoumaru.
Inuyasha could hardly fathom how much trouble and gold it would have taken Kikyou to acquire Sesshoumaru, all just because Inuyasha had told Kikyou about his jealousy of Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru had been the prodigy of their father—strong, clever, and full-blooded. Not only that, he had inherited everything of their father's that was worth inheriting.
Now, he had Kikyou, too.
With a mocking twist of his lips, Inuyasha thought that at least Kikyou cared enough to go through so much trouble just to spite him.
And on the missive, Kikyou had asked for Inuyasha's help.
They had had a falling out, but that didn't mean that Inuyasha would lose his honor and renege on his promise. He had promised that if Kikyou needed any help, she only needed to ask him and he would come.
And another part, a part of himself that he had tried to give up on, flared with the hope that maybe—just maybe—Kikyou had overcome whatever had been bothering her.
Maybe...
Thought flew out of his head as he beheld Kikyou sitting on her bed, her bare skin glittering under the soft candlelight.
Not that she needed it. Inuyasha was entranced anyway. Kikyou could see his demon savagery rising up within him, just because she was acting like a slut around him.
No wonder she had never seen him act as if he wanted her before.
Of course, before his entrance into her room, Kikyou had been a little bit worried. She had worried if she was attractive enough for Inuyasha. After all, if Inuyasha's tastes ran to little girls... Still, at least he wouldn't kill Kikyou the way he killed Kaede after he was done with her.
No, by then, he would be blood-bound.
Sango made sure that there was at least a foot between herself and Miroku so that Miroku's hand wouldn't wander where it shouldn't go. Yet.
In a fortnight, they would be married.
But there weren't married yet.
"Sango, you know I would love you for all eternity until the stars stop shining," Miroku was trying in vain to convince her to capitulate before the wedding night.
"The stars aren't shining now," Sango replied dryly.
Miroku sighed. "And when earth turns into dust."
"Earth is dirt, which is just wet dust."
"You are my only rose, Sango, my beautiful rare rose..."
"I'd better be your only rose." As Miroku was thinking about how to respond to that, Sango added, "And tell me honestly that you weren't eyeing the maid today."
"You know I only speak the truth to you, my love," Miroku said earnestly. "So I have to confess... I was."
Whack.
Miroku felt a bump form on the top of his head where Sango's boomerang had hit him. Miroku tried to stand up as Sango turned to leave, but the boomerang had hit him hard enough that he felt dizzy. "Sango," he pleaded instead.
"I love you, too, honey," she turned around to say as she blew him a raspberry. "But not tonight. They say that good things come to those who wait."
Miroku sighed.
He only hoped that the wedding wouldn't be pushed any later.
As it was, Miroku was cutting it close; He had a mere year left. His father had died at age thirty, and his grandfather, too, and for as many generations as Miroku could remember.
Miroku hated the thought of passing his curse down to his son—and gods, please let their first child be a son—but the alternative, the destruction of the world, was even worse.
And no matter what people assumed about him, he truly only wanted a life with Sango. The maid had been comely today, but she hadn't had the fire that Sango had.
Miroku sighed again. He just hoped that Sango can forgive him for what he hadn't told her.
Kagome hadn't accepted the blood-bond yet, but that was a puzzle to be solved another day. Sesshoumaru, though, had accepted the bond since his oath, and he could feel what she was feeling through the bond.
She was dead tired.
Sesshoumaru didn't know what the girl was trying to accomplish by remaining awake, but as her protector, Sesshoumaru held the authority to decide whether his mistress should rest or not.
He had never used his sedative vapor to cause his owners to sleep—they had been so much fun to hurt, but he couldn't bring himself to hurt such a young girl who was so exhausted already. He could deal with what she would dish out to him when she did.
Besides, she hadn't hurt him. Not really. The pain that she had induced had been nothing compared to his previous owners, and he had strange suspicion that even those pains weren’t inflicted on him on purpose.
As his mistress inhaled the sweet vapor, her body finally relaxed and her spine slumped. Sesshoumaru forced himself not to flinch as her head hit his shoulder.
He took a quick look at her, assessing her... but he couldn't come up with any logical conclusions. Asleep, she looked so innocent and peaceful that it made Sesshoumaru ache in a way that he couldn't quite explain even to himself.
And in that moment, Sesshoumaru didn't quite chafe at the blood-bond that restrained him from hurting her.
It was okay, though, Sesshoumaru reminded himself, because awake, she would still be his mistress, and she would still cause him pain, hurt him, and remind him exactly who she was to him.
at 9:26 AM Labels: fanfiction inuyasha property story
Now you’re gone
Draco stepped inside from the rain. It was a large room, much brighter than the storm covered sky outside. Flowers and people were everywhere, cheering, spilling wine. Being happy.
He almost wondered where a Weaseley would get that much money. Then, again, Potter was rich. And the Grangers, although they were just muggles.
Just one look, he promised himself, searching through the sea of faces for that bushy-haired, buck-teethed bride. Except, of course, her hair was now smooth as silk and her teeth were straight and white and perfect.
But Draco still liked thinking of Hermione as bushy-haired, buck-teethed.
There had been something very sweet about meeting a person like that.
He guessed meeting was all it ever was going to be.
I wonder why you left me here
I think about it on and on again
He had never hated Hermione. Not really. Oh, he had disliked her, but only because she was so smart, and so willing to let Potter and Weaseley take the credit.
They had even had to partner up once, in arithmancy, and they had turned in excellent work.
Draco smiled a little at that.
For whole two months, they were forced to be together. He had had to leave Crabbe and Goyle while she stayed away from Potter and Weaseley. Since she was so anxious about the school work, they had met regularly, two or three times a day.
He discovered that she was uninhibited when it came to knowledge and curiosity. That she was really quite spirited. Smart, too. And witty.
Nice, even.
He supposed that there were a lot of things he learned from the mud blood. She was certainly determined at times, and chiding, almost reminding him of a sister or a mother he had never had.
But he didn’t want a sister or a mother.
I know you’re never coming back
But I hope that you can hear me
Still, despite popular opinion, he had some morals. And he knew about his family. So he just let her be herself.
Always talking about Ron.
Ron, Ron, and Ron.
How Ron didn’t do his homework. How Ron didn’t study for his test. How Ron played another unappreciative joke on his family. How he broke another rule. Needed more help in tutoring.
Draco couldn’t understand how she made Ron’s faults sound so endearing. Faults were faults and they needed to be corrected. But listening to Hermione, Draco could almost believe that a person didn’t need to be perfect to survive.
In those two months - and sometime after - he would have killed to be Ron. But even killing wouldn’t make him Ron.
Because Ron was Ron and Draco was Draco.
Ron was poor. Draco was rich.
Ron had fiery red hair. Draco had a pale, platinum blond.
Ron had six siblings. Draco had none.
Ron’s family worked for a traitorous Ministry of Magic. Draco’s family was a family of loyal deatheaters.
Ron loved Potter. Draco hated Potter.
Ron was in Griffyndor. Draco was in Slytherin.
He supposed that that was that and there was no help for it. Even when Pansy Parkinson clung all over him at the Christmas dance and Parvati gossiped about how good looking he was underneath the clothes, he supposed there had never been any hope for it.
Now, he was just coming for one look.
I’m waiting to hear from you
Until I do
At the heart of the crowd, was the new Mrs. Weaseley, tossing her sleek brown hair and accepting hearty congratulations.
It would be on the paper the next day. Something like: Meant to be, The couple that grew up together around the Boy Who Lived. He certainly hoped it was something like that. Anything else, and he might just be tempted to hurt someone. The reporter.
Or the couple.
Ah, how he had anonymously supported Hermione financially years and years ago for some of her higher level education. And she had gotten a full scholarship, being as smart as she was.
“What are you going to do with all that money?” A reporter once asked her, and it had been written down on the newspaper as well.
“Hmm, I don’t know,” Hermione had answered. “A good cause, maybe. Like helping those who Voldemort had hurt so badly. Or little children in Africa. Or magical children stuck in unsupportive muggle families.”
“Nothing specific?” The reporter had pressed.
“Not really,” she had answered, then confided, “except that I’m setting a part aside for my wedding.”
“To whom?”
“I’m hoping he’ll ask soon.”
You’re gone away
I’m left alone
A part of me is gone
And I’m not moving on
So wait for me
I know the day will come
Just another look, Draco promised himself, as he stared at Hermione, laughing happily at the wedding.
She was beautiful now, he supposed. After her famed magical makeover, which had also been written about, there wasn’t a fault he could find about her.
Inside or out.
I’ll meet you there
No matter where life takes me to
I’ll meet you there
And even if I need you here
I’ll meet you there
I wish I could have told you
The words I kept inside
But now I guess it’s just too late
So many things
Remind me of you
I hope that you can hear me
I miss you
This is goodbye
One last time
And where I go you’ll be there with me
Forever you’ll be right here with me
I’ll meet you there
No matter where life takes me
I’ll meet you there
And even if I need you
I’ll meet you there
at 11:41 AM Labels: fanfiction harry potter oneshot story
With a sudden clarity, Sesshoumaru understood that Kagome had not changed; She had remained, even through the years of the most dreadful war, her pure and happy self, her eyes shining with that sweet innocence and selflessness. Perhaps, he mused, the Higurashi shrine did provide some sort of spiritual protection, encasing her soul so that that wildfire that was her spirit would not go out.
But he had changed.
"...Fluffy?" He heard Kagome call out his nickname when they had been neighbors—the Higurashi and the Taisho were once neighbors. It had been because of his tail.
It had been when standing out meant being special and being cherished.
He turned to look down at her. Strange, to think that they had used to be the same height, his silver long hair trailed behind him and her ebony hair trailed behind her.
After so many years, Kagome had remained petite, but Sesshoumaru had become tall. Taller, even, than his father, who stood at six one.
"Sesshu?" Kagome asked, a bit hesitantly, unsure of what Sesshoumaru was thinking of. She remembered when they had played together, and they had been the closest of the closest friends, no matter that they were at an age where boys caught cooties from girls.
When she had waited eagerly at the airport to pick up Sesshoumaru, she had remembered the little boy with curious eyes. He had said whatever was on his mind.
But, now, she could tell that something was on his mind by his unfocused eyes that gazed into memories that
Kagome was no longer so sure that he would be willing to share with her. For some reason—probably her naïveté—Kagome had always expected the same Fluffy that had left to come back. Now, she felt a bit lost and unsure.
Sesshoumaru did come back from the war safely, though, Kagome had to remind herself. And she would not lose a friend to the memories of war, no matter how horrifying or overwhelming.
"Ses—shy?" She called again and nudged at his arm gently when he still didn't respond.
Well, she certainly received a response from her nudging.
Flinched.
Sesshoumaru had flinched from her touch. When they had given each other a farewell hug and promised each other a reunion hug, he had flinched from her touch.
It made Kagome wonder if war was really that harsh.
"Don't touch me," Sesshoumaru's voice grated out. His voice had deepened and became more beautiful during that years that they had not seen each other, but it had also become cold. Cold like ice. Cold and distant and beautiful like the silver moon on winter nights.
Because he had become beautiful in that ethereal, majestic sort of way. Kagome had never thought about his appearance when they had been friends—and she was no longer so sure that he hoped for a continuation of the friendship—but now...
When Sesshoumaru had walked out of his gate, dressed in his traditional patterned gi and his tail draped over his like an extremely fluffy boa, he had seemed like an avenger samurai from novels of the feudal era, when youkai frightened humans and there were no human-youkai treaties.
But his golden eyes used to be the color of honey, of sweet childhood excitement. Now, it had hardened into an opaque stillness, reflecting everything without and showing nothing within. He stared as if suspicious and untrusting, and it hurt in a way that Kagome had never thought it would hurt.
Sesshoumaru had been her bestest of best friends, and she had waited eagerly for the day when Sesshoumaru would come back and their friendship would continue.
Only, it seemed as if Sesshoumaru hadn't come back. Instead, a beautiful stranger had taken his place and come back to a home that he did seem to truly want to come back.
Kagome wondered—Did Sesshoumaru really want to stay in the war which that newspapers had already started dubbing "the hellhole"?
Sesshoumaru saw the hurt in Kagome's eyes from his withdrawal. It was not just her facial expression or her shoulders that drooped; Her eyes had reflected her hurt with a sudden shadow cast upon it.
So expressive.
Even as a child, Kagome had been wonderfully expressive and truthful. She hid no thoughts or feelings, and he always knew when she tried.
Like now, she turned her face away slightly, not wanting him to know the hurt.
But he did and he hurt, too, because he had always considered Kagome someone he should protect. She was four years his junior, and only twelve when he had left to fight in the war. Now, she was eighteen.
And compared to her, he felt as if he was eighty.
He felt the apology slipping out of him, but it stuck at the tip of his tongue. In six years, he had learned not to apologize and not be sorry. If he hadn't, he would have long ago exhausted from regret.
He could still see the eyes of the men whom he had killed. Because so few youkai existed anymore, many of the armies he had fought against consisted completely of humans.
Once, he had killed at whole section of them single-handedly with his poisoned claws. If he thought too much, he would still see men falling helplessly, crumbling into dying heaps. Other men had realized to late—they opened their mouths to scream, but their voice cords had been ripped out along with their throats. The blood had sprayed everywhere, so that even those who had died of his toxic gas seemed to have wounds.
Ah, those who had died of his toxic gas... The green haze covered them, and the acid ate away at their clothes and guns before their dysfunctional minds even realized it. Then, they would wheeze and choke in their absurd attempts to gain oxygen, but it would only make them ingest the toxin faster. Their eyes bulged out, white from shock, and most of them had twisted their bodies in a grotesque shape because of their pain before they finally died, convulsing in pain.
How he wished he was back at the front again, to be able to control so precious as thing as life. He had snuffed hundreds out by his mere whim, and it had filled him with a terrible exhilaration.
He looked at Kagome, and then he would remember the shame of it, too. Because truly, what had the opposing soldiers done to Sesshoumaru.
Nothing more than to be on the opposing side. And Sesshoumaru supposed that that was enough.
He had seen instances where soldiers did not accept the morbid fascination with death, and instead ran away from sanity into the realms beyond. Sesshoumaru had sought to escape that fate.
And he did.
Only, he had changed. Hardened, some would say, but Sesshoumaru thought that it went far deeper than that.
You can say that bread hardened, but it would still be bread. Sesshoumaru had trouble remembering the boy he had once been.
And as much as he sought it, he could not find that bond that had tied him so closely to Kagome.
He could no longer befriend Kagome, and in a strange way, it was as if he had accepted that as fact a long time ago, when he joined the war: Kagome would remain loving in innocent while he would become a murderer.
And as much as he felt as if he should apologize to her, he didn't want to cause her further pain. If he severed the friendship—no, the friendship had already been severed—If he let her know that the friendship was no more now, she would get over it at once and endure less pain than if he let her hope foolishly, pointlessly.
So instead of his apology, he bit out, "If you have something to say, say it. Otherwise, don't waste my time."
He could smell the salt of her tears.
Kagome swallowed hard. She didn't want her reply to come out garbled. She felt as if this would be last meaningful thing she would tell him. She wanted it to be something honest, even if it would be his last memory of her. Especially if it would be his last memory of her.
"I liked you," she started. "And I was you friend. And I worried when you decided to leave for war. I waited... I waited for you return so that you would have a home to return to. I knew that you had never been very close with Inuyasha, and since you father had already passed away, I thought that it might be nice for me to welcome you home.
"I had hoped that we could continue our friendship. I wasn't stupid. I knew that you weren't going to be the same—nobody can live through something like that and not change. But I had hoped that you would still accept my friendship.
"But maybe not..." Kagome trailed off, unsure of what she wanted to say next.
"I don't need your friendship." Sesshoumaru rose from his chair in one graceful movement. "Nor do I want it. Waste it on somebody else."
Kagome watched helplessly as Sesshoumaru walked toward the door and exited the room. She added quietly to his back as he paused at the doorway, "If you ever change your mind, I'll be here."
at 12:25 AM Labels: fanfiction inuyasha oneshot story 1 comments
Categories:
Original Fiction
Harry Potter Fanfiction
Inuyasha Fanfiction
Original Fiction
Elemental Desire2/? chapters - WIP
Paranormal Romance
Teagan has existed since before he could remember and was quite bored with the blindly moving humans seventy floors below his penthouse. Losana enjoys a comfortable college life... complicated by her survainer magic.
He knows that the legend of the Heart's Desire is only a story. She is beginning to realize that her secret is far more than she has ever imagined.
Magic in Aquila2/? chapters WIP
Fantasy Romance
Rowana's mother brought her from their little village of Sarsen to the capital, Aquila, to study at the prestigious Lancer's Academy, despite that Rowana is Untalented and Lancer's caters to Talented students. When the wards around Aquila fall, though, and Rowana discovers she is Talented, she is pulled into a treasonous plot against the emperor himself.
Sunrise on a Dragon3/? chapters WIP
Fantasy Pre-Romance
Diedre was a princess who rode in the best of carriages... to be sacrificed to a dragon.
Untitled Storyplanning story
Paranormal Romance
Ariel is a college student who supports herself by working part-time patrolling the city against the Others. Samael is one of the Lucifer's Children--the Others--who works as an assassin because he can and it pays well. One day, Ariel saves Sam...
Harry Potter Fanfiction
Harry Potter and the Prince of Nightmares10/? chapters - WIP
Slash Romance
Harry/Draco
Draco Malfoy must take a mate in order to ascend to the throne as the Prince of Nightmares. The only choices he has, though, are Voldemort, Dumbledore, and Harry Potter, which really isn't a choice at all.
Meet You ThereOne-shot
Romance, Songfic
Draco/Hermione
Told from Draco's POV at Hermione and Ron's wedding. Only, Draco had always been in love with Hermione.
Inuyasha Fanfiction
Coming Back HomeOne-Shot
Pre-Romance
Sesshoumaru/Kagome
Inspired by a challenge on the site "A Single Spark", this one-shot takes place after Sesshoumaru comes back from the war to Kagome.
Property16 chapters [complete]
Romance
Sesshoumaru/Kagome
On Kagome's 16th bday, her cousin Kikyou gave her a slave. Actually, he's a bloodbound, which the humans equate with a slave, but Sesshoumaru still remembers what a bloodbond entails, even if humans have forgotten.
at 12:13 AM Labels: fanfiction fiction index story 1 comments